I've come to a new scientific conclusion: hard turds that block looser-plentiful dumps are sediment turds. All the gut-dust gathers at bottom of intestine river.
Whenever my friend John goes number two, he sends his friends a descriptive text message. This is a collection of those messages. John is unaware of this blog. He sends these text messages strictly for his own amusement, but I feel they should be shared with the world.
Disclaimer: Post times reflect the moment I receive his messages (Eastern Standard Time) and may not accurately represent the precise times of his dumps.